At some point in your life, not matter how easy going and obliging you are, you will run into some sort of conflict. Believe me, I know! I am personally not an over -dramatic person. I try to avoid people that cause problems and all my friends are mature, responsible people. Even though I try to avoid drama and problems, I have still had my share of conflicts, arguments, and “disasters”. For example, I am graduating this year, and there has been nothing but DRAMA when it comes to planning the ceremony! I am homeschooled, so our ceremony is different than a standard high school graduation. All the students sit on stage, the graduates have a slide show of their pictures from when they were babies until now, and both the graduates and the parents give speeches as the graduate receives the diploma. It is really an awesome experience. However, this year there were a ton of people who wanted to change the way things have always been done. This led to two groups of people: those who wanted things to stay the same and those who wanted things to be completely different. Everything was blown way out proportion and there was a lot of arguing and finger pointing going on. Everything is a lot better now, but all the annoying drama could have been avoided if everyone knew how to handle a conflict.
The first thing to remember when there is a disagreement is THINK BEFORE YOU ACT! If you are mad about something and say, write, or do something in the heat of the moment you will most likely regret it later on. So no matter how much it kills you to wait, take a couple hours or days to think it over and act rationally. Second, be willing to listen to the other person’s point of view and consider it before dismissing it. Third, be nice about what you say, don’t attack the person’s beliefs. Fourth, don’t take offence to what they say even if you don’t agree. Last but not least, say what you feel in person or over the phone, not in an e-mail, in a letter, or over text. Things sound a lot different when you are using voice inflections and when they can actually see your face and tell what kind of mood you are in. It will also take less time to say it instead of going back and forth through writing.
I hope you can avoid drama as much as possible, but no matter what happens, a good leader knows how to get their point across without attacking the other person or getting offended. Be yourself, be nice, be confident good luck!!!
-Kate Kane – March 2012